Nico Tortorella: Gender, Sobriety, Tattoos, Marriage & Career

Most people know Nico Tortorella as Josh from TV Land’s Younger — a charming love interest with a complicated heart. Born in 1988, Tortorella has spent the last decade building a public identity that’s even more layered: nonbinary, queer, sober, polyamorous, and covered in real tattoos.

Birth date: July 30, 1988 (age 36) · Known for: Role of Josh in TV Land’s Younger · Spouse: Bethany C. Meyers (married 2018) · Children: 2 · Identifies as: Gender nonbinary, queer, using they/them pronouns

Here are key biographical details about Nico Tortorella.

What is Nico Tortorella’s gender?

Nico Tortorella has publicly identified as gender nonbinary since at least 2020, using they/them pronouns consistently in contemporary coverage and interviews. In conversation with Audible (interview platform), Tortorella said, “I am gender nonbinary. I have always felt that way.” They have described their understanding of gender as shifting away from binary thinking, telling EUPHORIA. magazine that their identity exploration is tied to transformation through art.

How does Nico Tortorella describe their gender identity?

• They have said gender is fluid for them, not fixed (iHeart podcast).
• Tortorella has linked their queerness to addiction and sobriety in the same Audible interview, describing the “space between” as a theme.
• In a Young Hollywood on-camera interview, they discussed gender identity openly, explaining why binary labels don’t fit.

The implication: Tortorella’s gender narrative is built on personal testimony, not external validation.

Is Nico Tortorella in a polyamorous relationship?

Yes. Tortorella and their spouse, Bethany C. Meyers, practice ethical non-monogamy and have spoken openly about their nontraditional marriage. In the same Audible interview, Tortorella said: “Our relationship is not traditional. It’s open, it’s honest.” They have described their union as “polyamorous” in multiple public statements.

What does Nico Tortorella say about their marriage style?

• Tortorella has said the couple practices “ethical non-monogamy” and that honesty is the foundation.
• The exact boundaries of their arrangement remain private—Tortorella has not detailed rules or partners.
• Both have emphasized that their relationship is a mutual choice, not a dysfunction (iHeart podcast).

The pattern: Tortorella uses selective disclosure to maintain privacy while championing openness.

Why does Nico Tortorella wear dresses?

Tortorella frequently wears dresses, skirts, and gender-fluid clothing as a deliberate expression of their nonbinary identity. In interviews, they have said that clothes are a tool for challenging gendered norms. Speaking to EUPHORIA. magazine, Tortorella noted that fashion is part of their artistic transformation and self-discovery.

What is the meaning behind Nico Tortorella’s fashion choices?

• They have stated that wearing dresses is not about shock value but about authenticity.
• Tortorella’s wardrobe mixes masculine and feminine pieces, often seen in public and on red carpets.
• Their style has been covered as a form of activism—normalizing gender nonconformity in mainstream entertainment.

The catch: Fashion is one of the most visible ways Tortorella enacts nonbinary identity outside of language.

Is Nico Tortorella sober?

Yes, Tortorella has been sober from alcohol since 2014. In the Audible interview, they described alcohol as their “poison” and credited the plant kratom as part of their 11-year sobriety maintenance: “Kratom is a plant that has helped me stay sober for 11 years.” They frame sobriety as “fluid”—meaning they exclude alcohol but do not make absolute claims about all substances.

What substance does Nico Tortorella credit for sobriety?

• Kratom, a plant-based compound, is cited by Tortorella as a tool in their ongoing sobriety.
• They have linked addiction to their queerness, viewing both as part of a continuum rather than fixed states.
• Medical consensus on kratom’s efficacy for addiction recovery remains unsettled (iHeart podcast context).

The implication: Tortorella’s sobriety narrative is deliberately individual and non‑prescriptive.

Does Nico Tortorella really have all those tattoos?

Yes, the tattoos are real. Tortorella has multiple visible tattoos on their hands, arms, and neck. In a Young Hollywood interview, they showed off the ink and talked about the meaning behind some pieces. The exact number has not been publicly counted, but the tattoos are genuine and not temporary.

How many tattoos does Nico Tortorella have?

• No official count exists in public records.
• They have discussed specific designs, including symbolic references to their identity and family.
• The tattoos are frequently visible in social media posts and public appearances.

The pattern: The tattoos are a visual record of Tortorella’s identity, but the full catalog remains private.

What is Nico Tortorella’s age and background?

Nico Tortorella was born on July 30, 1988, in Wilmette, Illinois, USA (Wikipedia biography database). They began acting in the late 2000s and broke through with a role in Scream 4 (2011). Their most famous role is Josh in TV Land’s Younger, which ran from 2015 to 2021.

What are Nico Tortorella’s key movies and TV shows?

• Younger (TV Land, 2015–2021) – as Josh
• Scream 4 (2011) – as Trevor
• The Following (2014) – recurring role
• Dirty John: The Betty Broderick Story (2020) – as Larry

The takeaway: Tortorella’s career trajectory shows an actor who has moved from supporting roles to a defining TV lead.

Who is Nico Tortorella married to?

Tortorella married Bethany C. Meyers in March 2018 (Wikipedia biography database). Meyers is a fitness entrepreneur and the founder of the be.come project. The couple has two children, the second born in 2023. They have been open about their nontraditional relationship structure.

When did Nico Tortorella get married?

• March 2018 – wedding date confirmed by multiple sources.
• First child born in 2020; second in 2023.
• The couple has stated they do not want to conform to traditional marriage expectations (iHeart podcast).

The pattern: Tortorella and Meyers have built a high‑profile marriage that defies conventional norms while protecting key details.

In their own words

“I am gender nonbinary. I have always felt that way.”

— Nico Tortorella, Audible interview

“Our relationship is not traditional. It’s open, it’s honest.”

— Nico Tortorella, Audible interview

The thread through each quote: Tortorella uses first-person testimony to claim space between binaries—gender, relationship norms, sobriety definitions. The implication for readers is that celebrity identity is often more layered than a label can capture.

Summary

Nico Tortorella’s public life is a case study in how one person can occupy multiple identities without contradiction: nonbinary actor, sober public figure, polyamorous spouse, tattoo collector. For fans and followers, the lesson is that authenticity often means living in the “space between” categories. For journalists covering public figures, the takeaway is clear: always verify personal claims against primary interviews and be wary of assuming a single label defines a whole person. For the broader audience navigating similar questions about gender, sobriety, and relationships, Tortorella’s example offers a template—but not a prescription.